The last few years have been challenging. Ever since that phone call in December 2007, things have not been the same. I had just won the Sommelier of the Year competition when I got a cryptic call from my mom. She's fun that way. All she would say was that I needed to get home ASAP. Upon my arrival, I find out that she has to go into the hospital for a lumpectomy and I need to take care of dad. My dad's Alzheimers was rather advanced but still managable.
The operation went well but she required 6 weeks of radiation. Those were special mother/daughter moments. We didn't kill each other so, overall, it was a success. I credit that success to Grey Goose. I drank a lot of vodka in that 6 weeks. I think I should of gotten a token of appreciation from them as I'm sure their stocks went up. After this there was the sale of the family home that they had been in for 42 years. Another fun event as they had not thrown anything away in all that time. Dad figured, we have the room, might as well hang on to it. The house got sold, a condo was purchased and they were settled.....sort of.
Dad's Alzheimers progressed quite rapidly in 2008. He really needed to go into a home but mom would not hear of it. I headed back to Italy and within less than a month I get another call. She can't handle dad and he needs to go into a home. With 2 weeks until Christmas that wasn't going to happen so she just had to hang in there. Dad went into a home in January 2009.
I cannot put into words how awful it is to watch someone you love deteriorate right in front of your eyes. To see them so scared and helpless. It just broke my heart. When all seemed settled, I went back to Italy. One month later, I get a call. By this point I'm really hating that phone. Dad was in the hospital and things weren't looking good. It was 3 am for me and I was on a plane at 10 am. Thank goodness for the internet. I made it to the hospital 24 hours after I'd spoken with mom. Dad passed less than 6 hours later.
The rest of the year passed with little drama as did 2010. 2010 had drama (thanks Casa Italia) just not family drama. By the end of the year mom decided she no longer wanted to live alone and wanted to go into a retirement facility. An excellent decision. So I returned in March to list the condo and get the wheels in motion. I figured by summer all would be sorted. Not so. The market is in the toilet and nothing is moving and the weight of the past few years began to take their toll.
The past few months have been challenging. Trying to stay positive and focused in what is becoming a never ending state of limbo. A decision needed to be made and even though I knew what it was, I was afraid to make it. The other night it was made for me. I came home to an awful message from my mother. She had fallen and was in quite the state. By the time I called her back, she was calm and had gotten some help. I spent the next day with her. She isn't injured. I'm not even sure what she actually did to cause her to fall. But now, she's taking full advantage. As a friend of mine once said, she installed the buttons so she knows exactly where they are to push. Last night she called at 2 am wondering where I was. She had no clue it was 2 am. Now I get to add over-medicating to my list of concerns.
So, with all of that, I have decided to relocate back in January. I can no longer be torn between 2 worlds as I'm the one who will snap. Don't know what I will do just yet. Lumber or wine? Maybe lumber with a side of wine. I will probably take even more wine courses. I'm sure there's some obscure wine producing nation that I haven't come across yet.
But until then, I'm going to enjoy the rest of the year. My annual Halloween cruise is just around the corner and if anyone can raise my spirits, my Aquafest family can. I will go back to Italy for Christmas as planned. People are counting on me to cook a turkey and I hate to disappoint.
And I will continue to share my observations in a way that I hope everyone finds entertaining even if not always the most PC.
If there's a dumbass out there, you know he'll find me.
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