Bed Hog

I've gotten used to sleeping alone in my king size bed. Even though I tend to keep to one side, it's nice being able to stretch out when the mood strikes. Here in Italy, I have to share a bed. It's not so bad most nights but occasionally I feel my sleep space being encroached upon. I don't mind the warm body pushed up next to me or even having the covers pinned down. The snoring is what bothers me the most.

But I just don't have the heart to kick him out of bed. Would you?

High Heels and Cobblestones: Italian Driving Rules

I recently came across some observations that I wrote 8 years ago when I first moved to Italy. Surprisingly (or not), most are still valid today. So I thought I'd share some of these orginal stories. I've called this collection, High Heels and Cobblestones because like those two items, Italy and I sometimes don't work well together.

Italian Driving Rules

Driving in Italy is a daily adventure. Each day when I’m out I see something new and absurd done. I’ve stopped being shocked and surprised. To help any future travelers, I’ve compiled a list of rules. I’m sure these will help you make sense of the Italian roads.

#1. If your car fits you can go there

#2. If your car doesn't fit, you can still go there

#3. Just because your lane does not have a dotted white line down the middle does not mean it's not 2 lanes

#4. Signals????? Obviously a North American concept. Except in LA

#5. If you drive anything 2 wheeled, you can go anywhere you want. Traffic laws do not apply to you.

#6. Stop signs. A roadside decoration of no real purpose.

#7. Passing. Solid white line, dotted white line, yellow line. They are just a guideline. Kind of like in video games.

#8. If you see someone you know, feel free to stop to say hello. Pulling off to the side not required.

#9. If, while driving, you intersect with a one way street, and your destination happens to be behind you, feel free to turn left then throw it in reverse and punch the accelerator until you find a parking spot. On-coming traffic, or in this case, rear-coming traffic will adjust.

#10. If you and your buddies desire to have an impromptu game of soccer, feel free to play where ever you like. Major roadways need not be excluded as the traffic will adjust

Luxury Dog Tax

The economic woes of various European countries has been a news staple for the last few months. Italy has recently made some major changes to their political landscape and the country's economic state is causing many to worry. So what can a stuggling economy due to bolster its coffers? Tax dogs of course.

One of the economic measures being proposed is to place a tax on 'luxury dogs'. You are probably asking yourself (as I did) what is a luxury dog? This has yet to be properly defined but the best guess would be a dog purchased from a breeder versus one picked up at the humane society. The logic here is, if you can afford to spend the money to purchase one of these dogs and care for it, you're obviously making too much money and you should be taxed. This tax is on top of the licensing and registration fees you already pay for your dog.

In a country where abandoning your pet is common place when you go on holiday, this is the worst idea possible. As it is, many Italians just abandon Fido and Puss Puss before going on vacation. They can't be bothered to find accomodation for their animals while they hit the beaches so they just set them free. Can you imagine what will happen if this tax is actually put in place? Pampered pooches will be left to their own devices. Scenes from Beverly Hills Chihuahua are running through my head (don't judge me, I was on a plane when I watched it).

Animal activists are already up in arms about this and rightfully so. I suggested that all one had to do is take their pet to the humane society and put it up for adoption then go back the next day and adopt them. They would then have paperwork stating that they got their dog from the humane society instead of a fancy breeder.

Just doing my part to help out our furry four-legged friends.